March 21, 2023

It makes me laugh that whilst pregnant I put so, so much emphasis on birth and didn't give breastfeeding a second thought. Birth lasting less than a day and the latter IV been at for a total of 6 years. Luckily we had no trouble with latch and the journey has been pretty breezy. My boobs amaze me. Just women in general,  our bodies..... just wow! The comfort my breasts give my children is like a magical antidote to all situations. 

Watching the relationship between baby and boob has been a real eye opener for the instinctual nature we all hold. (Especially when they are cluster feeding as a newborn to bring the milk in!) How do they know that's what they need to do- The innate intelligence blows me away. Breastfeeding has been a lesson in surrender. Baby wants to feed continuously, well I'll snuggle in and binge watch Netflix, or read a book IV wanted to for ages. Obviously this is easier with a first child. When I feel resistance to breastfeeding, this is when it gets hard. These times I just have to step out of my head into body and dive into those grateful milk drunk eyes, then, it's all good. Just writing and imagining this makes me nostalgic and I can feel my breasts responding! 

IV gained a mountain more compassion and connection to other mammals, I feel to be no different with them in regards to motherhood. I feel we all have the same nurturing pull towards our children, the same unconditional love and fierce protectiveness. 

Breastfeeding has given me the freedom to be spontaneous and travel light. The mother provider, nurturer, an unbreakable bond. Let's honour the darker aspects too. Aversion, twiddling (cringe), Baba getting used to teeth, hormonal surges. Resentment has crept in at times, when you solely breastfeed it's on you to provide and sometimes you just need a break, unfortunately society doesn't really support the mother role in general, but, like every other emotion these are fleeting (e-motion = energy in motion) What's left behind is the unshakable, unconditional, love that is underlying all nature and within all beings.