8 out of 52, season 5
Today was a travel day! We set the alarm for 3:45 and jumped out of bed (daddy and I stayed up way too late for such an early morning, we didn't get to sleep until around midnight!) The two of you were sound asleep but it actually wasn't hard to get you out of bed and dressed and ready to go.
As we opened the front door to head to the car a crazy amount of moths flew in and traded spots with us. The first thing you, Forrest, did was look up into the star filled sky exclaiming "Look! Look!". We were on the road just before 4:45. Annoyingly the M3 was closed so we needed to go the long way around. In the car you, Forrest, named your frog (which just had to come with you) Greeny-browny-i-love-you-owen. You both really wanted to sleep but said you couldn't because you liked the music on radio 1 too much and Nixie you were busy looking out at the stars saying you could see the unicorn constellation.
With just less than an hour and half left of the journey, you, Forrest fell asleep. Although it wasn't a long nap you only slept for maybe 40 min. Nixie, you were complaining of a bit of a tummy ache but it's just because you were hungry; I shared the same feeling. Our strange route to Gatwick turned out being quite nice, driving through sweet little villages and tree lined country roads much better than the M3! For the last 15 min of our journey you, Forrest, wanted to hold my hand which wasn't the most comfortable position for me but you proceeded to give my hands and fingers all the kisses in the world.
The long stay parking was incredibly full but we managed to find a spot and then walked to the shuttle bus. Once we checked in our luggage and made our way past security we headed to our favourite place for breakfast when at Gatwick and we even got lucky with a window seat! Both of you loved looking out the window at all the planes and it stirred lots of conversations. After you both finished your pancakes we waited in the departure lounge until we could go to our gate. At one point we were told to go to our gate to only be told to go back because our flight was delayed. It ended up being delayed two hours and you were both starting to get really tired and hot and bothered (as were me and daddy). But once on the plane our annoyances were all forgotten. Forrest, you got to sit by the window and you absolutely loved taking off telling us how cool everything was and Nixie you were proud of yourself because you weren't as scared as last time although you were still a little bit. You told me you were scared the wing was going to break off. I had said you could have your tablet on during takeoff and you told me "no, I'll wait until we are up in the air because I want to follow the rules as best as I can" it seemed like a weird and funny thing to come out of your mouth but it was also really sweet. Once up in the air the two of you grabbed your tablets out of your bag and watched a movie. You, Nixie tried to have a nap at one point and tried to use my lap as a pillow but you struggled and then your ears kept popping and it scared you a little because you were worried you lost your hearing. But just as you were getting a bit more comfy it was time to land.
Once on the ground it was time to go through passport control and they keep reminding me that I need to get your Swedish passports and I really do! Then we grabbed our suitcase and bought each of us except Forrest a weekly travel card and then got on the train to Stockholm. While we were waiting for the train, you, Forrest, were amazed at the stone walls and absolutely loved them. Once we arrived at t-centralen we walked a bit more to the green line on the subway to make our way to Anita's place in Björkhagen. But first we needed to get the keys that she had dropped off for us at the grocery store and shortly after that we could finally free our arms and put down all of our bags and relax a little bit. It was already around 17:00 when we got in. So much later than expected.
I love how I feel as soon as I step foot here, it feels like home. I just love the view and the feeling of seeing everything for miles and miles. Nixie, you really love it too and immediately went and sat in the swing and then proceeded to do some drawing. You, Forrest, loved showing your toys the place and told me that they really loved it here. Once me and daddy finished our coffee it was time to head out again. We were really (all of us) running on empty by this point but I had to go make a quick visit to see my mamma. It would feel absolutely wrong to me if I didn't see her the same day I arrived. To get to where she lives it meant back on the subway then the pendeltåg.
The last time we saw her was a year ago to the day and Nixie, you really struggled. I was hoping it would be different this time and we had talked about it a lot before coming but you had a hard time again and were unable to say hi or even look at her and you kept running out of the room and hiding in the halls. Even when my mum acknowledged you, you couldn't respond and just hid behind daddy. At least this time I had no expectations whatsoever and I know that you were trying your very hardest and I was super proud of you for that, at least you did make it into the room.
When we had first arrived her room was dark and she was asleep (it was only about 18:40) but one of the nurses/care people gently knocked and dimmed the lights on and she stirred so I went straight over to her and kneeled beside her and asked if she knew who I was. She said no. She didn't even know she had a daughter. I told her she actually had two. Me and Anita. After a while of this conversation in a loop she started asking me, “so you are my daughter?” And I would say yes and she would say “oh that makes me so happy! I'm so happy you are here! That makes it so special.” I told her it was my bday tomorrow and she asked how old I was nowadays and I told her I'll be 44 tomorrow and that it was 44 years tomorrow since she gave birth to me. Then I asked if I could give her a snuggle in bed and she said yes and it was so incredibly sweet and it made her so happy. It brought back feelings of being little again. What really struck me this time was how happy and loving she seemed. She had beautiful glimmers in her eyes and she just seemed so innocent. She loved watching you, Forrest, twirl around in circles and said how cute you looked but was worried you were going to get so dizzy that you'd fall over.
Our visit with my mamma, your mormor was incredibly short. We only stayed a half hour because I didn't want to keep her awake as I knew she needed her sleep and also we were exhausted and needed to eat and we needed to time the train to catch back so that it wouldn't get much later. After lots and lots of hugs and kisses between me and my mamma (daddy also gave her big hugs but she didn't understand that he was my husband and thought that daddy was her son!) and me telling her that we will see her tomorrow for cake we were off yet again.
By this point we were all fading fast. We somehow managed our way back to Björkhagen (but not without injuries, Forrest, you fell on the subway because you weren’t holding on and hurt your leg. I had to carry you the rest of the evening) then to the grocery store to get some few bits and bobs just for something quick to eat and then made it back to our home away from home and ate some dinner. Nixie, you were really sweet and told me you loved laying in the corner where the light is just so you can look out and how much you love the view. You, Forrest were still complaining off and on about your foot so we will see how you are on it tomorrow but I think you were just exhausted.
Because the sofa bed is really only big enough for two of us, you, Nixie and daddy slept in Anita's room. She's away on a canoeing trip until Sunday so you'll sleep there until she's back and then we will be able to grab the other bed from the cellar. We said our goodnights to each other and then I didn't read more than two pages of the Wild Robot before you, Forrest, were in a deep sleep.